Manidhanai verupetha Eliya vazhimurai(Easy ways to irritate people)!!
This post is out of my experience on my travel to INox city center by mtc a couple of days back,these were some of my experiencers and could be taken as the best way to see one animated in the bus(thats wat i faced in the bus)
- If yo are college student or you are in your vacation time ,always board a crowded bus,never go in for a vacant one
- When you get into the bus make sure you wear the dirtiest possible dress you can ever look for.eg:take it directly from the washing machine,or use the shirt continuously in chennai(preferably summer) for a span of say fifteen days without washing etc
- If your a tall guy then its just a easy task to irritate the guy next to you,pretent as though your holding the bar above your head and get your hands close to the nest guys nose and wait for his reaction.(Note:dont have any eye contact with person just lend your ears to him,you could hear sounds like "chai" ,"thoo","wuack","enna kodumai sir")
- If your a short guy say a five foot tall chap its a kind of difficult way...but follow the procedure properly...use eucalyptus oil or may be coconut oil for one continous without showing what moisture is to your hair....then put your hair close to the next guys nostrils,instant noise would be "Hmmmmmm chi"
- If your carrying a single bag try to split the load and put it into a couple of bags(preferably of large size),never keep the baggage in empty locations,carry it in your hand,place it on the next guys leg or keep it on ur head and walk ,make strange noises as you move and pretend as though there is no fault of yours.
- If its a really crowded bus close your eyes and leave your slipper at one place...open your eyes after a few minutes and then start searching for it ,important thing to be followed here is you need to shout ,"Aio serupa kaanum serupa kaanum..." and the ppl next to you would feel "dardaram".
- carry 500 rupee notes and give to the conductor for tickets..."Kalangathala varan paaru saavugragky" this is what the conductor would say and this is the best occasion to fight out for your respect and fundamental rights
- When the bus is packed with people you shout "Ulla ponga sir!ulla ponga nariya edam irku paarunga,Ulla poonga" keep saying these lines time and again.
- The best way is always target legs while walking never walk on the wooden part...
PS:Evil thoughts by ajit :)
Dasavatharam!!!
